A word that conjures so many feelings; be they positive, negative or confusion. Reflecting on events over the last few weeks, I tweeted ( @laulauev ) a short post about it: “even though we may accept a situation, it doesn’t mean that we’re happy about it, it’s just better than banging your head against a brick wall”. And there it is. As humans, do we accept situations that we are faced with, out of open-mindedness or resignation? Is it better to keep the peace rather than rock the boat?
I have witnessed situations that I can empathise with and as such, could give an honest opinion. Being forthright is, believe it or not, a trait in me, that people seem to value. Anyway, back to the task at hand. Sitting amongst family and loved ones during Christmas, I realised there was a really lovely vibe. Was it because I’ve accepted that, although it’s strange to be talking to my eight-year-old half-sister as if she were my granddaughter, it pleased my dad and his young partner? As a result, I had not created any friction between the family. I accept it. I’ve given up voicing my opinions. There was a time when my father’s views of my having a mixed-race child (Ha! I didn’t stop at one, I went for a hat-trick) were downright awful, and although he came to adjust to the fact, the subject became the albatross around our necks. The tables have turned 360 degrees and now he seeks the very same thing that I had. Sometimes, you have to shrug your opinions off your shoulders, for the sake of peace. More importantly, for yourself. For the preservation of sanity.
I recently received news from a friend whose son “came out”. Good for him. I’m so glad he did it now and didn’t live a life of secrecy for years. It wouldn’t have been conducive to the young man’s formative teenage life. Because the masses have fought tirelessly for their rightful place in society, we are more accepting of the change. Schools have made it a safe place for students to speak their feelings and give them a venting platform. As such, it’s an easier transition from uncertainty to certainty.
Then we have the masses that have demonstrated their frustrations during lockdown regulations being imposed by the government. Regulations that caused heartache, depression and upset for thousands of people. Some refused to accept the incessant barrage of rules and chose to live life accordingly. Then there were those who, although resented what was happening (including, me) went with the law, because, well, it was the law. See? Accepting but are not happy with it. Now, it transpires that while we were abiding by the rules, the government weren’t. The result? A nation of unhappy citizens who feel cheated because they obeyed the edict forced upon them, for the sake of family and friends’ health…but at what cost? So, you see. Although being tolerant of certain situations can create a harmonious state of mind, it can also cause feelings of deep resentment.
Be safe, be healthy. Take care, Eva x